It is when I am sitting at my desk, in the office where I will be an intern for five months till May and literally doing nothing since there is no task left to do that this question pop up. To be honest, I have been asking myself this question many times these days, since there is one big decision need to be made upon it. I won’t write down what it is yet since I still need more time to think through everything.
But let’s get back to the question itself. I assume that each person has his/her own lists of things or people or whatever it can be that contribute to his/her happiness. I also have mine and I supposed you also have one for yourself, with or without your awareness. Then, it would be ideal to have all of those in your life, to be the happiest person in your own definition. However, it is not the case in life after all. I have known people who luckily get all of the things in their list but still desire something else that they do not even know what that is just because they still are not happy. On the other hand, there are people who might just have about one third of the list with them and still find happiness in everyday alive. So, I suppose, it is not the matter of how many percent you get on that list or even how long and realistic should that list be to bring us the so-called happiness we all desire for, but how you let the list affect your real happiness.
I have known several examples of people purchasing the goal which they believed can bring happiness not only to themselves but also to their families and beloved ones. They chase after that goal for a long time until they get exhausted and have nothing left, even the people they want to share that happiness with. During that extensive journey, there are countless times for those people to realize the fact that actually it will not award them with the happiness they hoped for or either makes their beloved ones happy. However, once that goal is on “the list” and especially is put on the top, then there is hardly any chance for those people to give up and change their prospective of the whole thing. Personally, it is when they are lost. Lost in their own goal, their own illusion of the happiness that they thought is theirs. I used to be one of those beloved ones.
So, whatever the reason for your happiness is/are, do not let it be the only one and control your whole happiness.
As your life is made up of a series of moments, people, feeling; your happiness should also be the same. While you are purchasing the path to happiness, please remember that it is not the only way. I think happiness is not something that you can achieve once you finished ticking the list or it will stay with you forever no matter what happens. I do not even know if it is something “to achieve” after all since you still be happy on the way to your goal or before you put it in “the list”.
Therefore, if there is one item on that list which cannot be done or purchased, that does not mean you lose your happiness. That means it is time to cross that item out of the list and learn to be happy without it.
P.s: In ” The Perks of Being a Wallflower”, Charlie’s mom replied to her daughter when the girl said her boyfriend is her whole world:
“Don’t ever say that about anyone again. Not even me.”